Single Moms, here's a single mom story to give you hope, inspiration and a glimpse into your possible future:
Beate Chelette is a 43-year-old single mom, entrepreneur, and most recently a self-made multimillionaire. After receiving a degree in photography-and being the youngest photo editor on record for Elle Magazine in her native Germany, she immigrated to the United States in 1989. Most recently she published a book, Women Who Want It All and Get It, too! A single mom since 1995, Beate has lots of wisdom to share. Her daughter, Gina, turned sixteen this year. She believes being a single mom is a world of making sacrifices and focusing on a few very important things – starting with our children and our jobs. She says she really didn’t have time for anything else. She notes that getting organized and putting your priorities in order is crucial for single mom success.
In the beginning, and for many years, she didn’t spend a lot of time going out, treating herself to spa weekends or fancy restaurants. While still on a budget, her self-care consisted of things that were within her reach, such as going for a bicycle ride or taking inexpensive art classes at the local museum. “It made me feel like I was focusing on myself a little but it wasn’t elaborate.” Beate understood what I meant when I talked about “The Tunnel.” For her, this was the period at the beginning that was about self-pity and “What was I thinking? How did I pick this person?” While she never regretted having her daughter, she noted there is definitely a period of wrangling with the decision that seemed to have backfired so badly.
Her positive attitude became apparent when she said, “You say to yourself, ‘I can’t change it, I’m going to roll up my sleeves and move on.’” This is about making the decision that what has happened, what is happening, isn’t going to break you. You’re going to survive, thrive and flourish. Period.
That’s exactly what she did – she started a business with very little money and eventually sold it for several million dollars to a privately-held company owned by Bill Gates. “At the end of the day, I knew I was a good person and the joke could not be on me. I refused to accept that the decisions that I had made to get married, and have a child was going to be the end. What was the spiritual message? That I wasn’t going to be the loser. I was going to be the winner – I believed there was something out there for me. I accepted that the great love affair, the great marriage, wasn’t the thing for me at the time. I saw other single moms – they were so angry and so hateful. I said to myself, ‘I am not going to be an overweight, angry single parent that is going to eventually end up as a spinster!’”
She defines success as arriving at a point when you know you are self-sufficient, when you know you’ve made it. She says, “I know I’ve made it - I know I can take care of myself. I’m the queen of the world now, I can do whatever I want. I can relax and allow myself to enjoy the journey.” Today, Beate runs a successful consulting company, and is promoting her new book, watching her daughter flourish in school and out, and enjoying a committed, happy relationship. Her message for you, dear reader, is “You’re going to make it! There are lots of sacrifices but you will make it – I promise you this will pass and your day will come!” You can listen to my interview with Beate on my website at www.coachhonoree.com.
Now its time to focus on you. Are you ready? We’re going to work on cracking your code for the remainder of this book, so let’s get started!
*The above is an excerpt from The Successful Single Mom book.
Honorée has dedicated her life to being a positive force for good. She writes personal and professional growth and development books, and The Successful Single Mom book series. As an executive coach and corporate trainer, she turns service providers into rainmakers, average producers into rock-stars, and dreams into reality. For more information on how she can specifically help you or your organization, click here.